Long gone are the days when wedding speeches were a sausage fest. A typical wedding now might have a speech by the maid of honour, the bride’s mother and the groom’s best woman before you even get to sit down to dinner. This is a very good thing – in my experience woman are a lot better at public speaking than most men.
Along with these women toasters though has come the rise of the Couple’s wedding speech. The bride and groom stand up together to deliver their thank. And while these can be very entertaining, they can also be the cause of pre-marital distress. He wants a funny speech, she wants it serious. He wants to do it in straight prose while she was thinking limericks.
So how do you get to a speech that you can both agree on without getting divorced before you’re married?
1. Know what you want before you start writing
I’ve worked on several couple speeches and it still surprises me how many couples don’t know what they each want from a speech when they meet me to discuss it. I spend more time trying to get them to agree than working on the speech for them.
Avoid this is you can. Take some time to list out the things you want the speech to be so you know exactly where you stand. Then you can start negotiating.
2. Remember the important things – Thank You’s and Flattery
You need to make sure you thank the right people. You also want to make sure that you remember to say a little bit about each other. Finally, you probably need to end on some kind of toast, to the Best people, or the wedding guests or someone important. Build the speech around these key moments and use them to structure the rest.
3. It doesn’t have to be traditional though
Even though you still have to say the important things there are no set rules for a couple’s wedding speech yet. So if you want to break into song – do it. If you’d like to do the speech whilst boxing each other – knock yourself out. You have the opportunity to make it anything you want to be.
4. Be prepared to compromise
If you’ve got the the point of being engaged you’ve already learn how much of a relationship is about compromise. Some grooms feel threatened when a bride want’s to speak. Some brides’ think groom’s don’t take the speeches seriously enough. Remember it’s not her big day, or his big day, it’s your big day. It’s about both of you. Try to find a way to make at least part of the speech what the other person wants it to be.
5. Find a way to both enjoy it
In the end, the best way to get a great speech is do something you’ll both enjoy doing. If you’re both massive muppet fans why not do it with puppets? If you first got to know each though Tinder why not fill your speech with Emoticons and text speak? It’s your speech after all, and so long as you’re enjoying it your guests will too.
Remember, you’re not restricted. Don’t be afraid to show the world who you really are. Your speech is one of your first public statements as a married couple and the perfect time to show people what you become when you join together.
Just remember that compromise is the key of every successful marriage – you might as well master it on your wedding day.
Want some help with your couple’s wedding speech? Get in touch on 07541 703079 or E-mail me now for a no obligation quote!